My Heart Today

My soul is tired, my body is tired.
Lord give me words, the words that haven't been there in so long.
I long to talk, but nothing comes out.
Lord give me strength and endurance, strength that presses on towards You.
I long to walk, alongside of You.
In my head I come up with doubts, I come up with fear, everything not of You.
But I continue to not understand why You keep bringing me back to You.
I'm stupid, I continue to walk in a way where at some point I start thinking that I can do it on my own, without You. I clearly step aside and in my life and in my actions say, "I don't care anymore"
But the truth is, that never once have You left me, never once have You called me stupid, never once have You given up and said, "I don't care anymore".
You keep telling me, "NEVER will I leave you, NEVER will I forsake you."
Lord give me grace to never leave You, or forsake Your ways.